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The Cabin

by D.B.T profile profile profile

Surreal
2015

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7 of 7 people found the following review helpful:
Generic plot, terrible interface, and.... QBASIC?, October 1, 2015
This review will be written to the author as I'm going to try and be as constructive as possible.

Okay.

Great that you're getting into writing IF, it's such an awesome genre.

I'm going to start by saying that I had to install the qb64 compiler to get this game to run. The majority of people playing your game don't know what qbasic is, and linking them to the qb64 forum isn't a good starting point. If people don't know what to do to get your game working, they won't play it. Compile your game and upload it to a server, and link it with the "download link" button on IFDB.

Also, consider that a lot of people, especially in the IF community, aren't running Windows. Try and compile to a neutral format, or offer binaries for multiple operating systems. I had to compile qb64 to be able to compile your game to get it to run on my machine (linux).

I'd recommend you have a look at FreeBASIC as a multi-platform alternative, with more features. It is based on QBASIC.

QBASIC, or at least the engine you have written/used, is not really appropriate as a parser. It would be better to either use a proper interactive fiction parser language (eg. TADS or Inform), or write the game in more of a choose-your-own adventure style.

The plot was pretty cliched, but could be expanded on to make it more interesting. Don't spoon feed them the story, let them come to the conclusions you want them to come to.

The writing was poor with spelling mistakes and bad grammar everywhere. Proof-read your work!

The room descriptions were completely static. I would make things like the headache and reminiscing about the scent of nature events which happen when you enter the room for the first time, and use the room descriptions to 'paint a picture' in the viewer's mind. I want to feel like I'm in the cabin - what do the walls look like? What colors are the curtains? What furniture is there? Show, don't tell. One (and probably the only) place you did this well was the hardwood floor.

The directions should be given verbally. The map didn't make a lot of sense until I guessed a direction to go in.

The countdown mechanic was interesting but far too long.

The game lacks detail - the cabin was nowhere near big enough, or at least there wasn't enough to do/see in it.

The "good ending" is completely counterintuative.

The "bad ending" didn't make a lot of sense either. What motivation would the player have to do that?

You've got the start of something potentially interesting here. What you need to do is proof-read, refine, and spend much more time in designing your world - and use a better language to put it together.

Good luck with your future games!

J

Comments on this review

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namekuseijin, September 26, 2016 - Reply
> He loves this genre so much, that he purchases many of the old DOS text adventures from yesteryear so he can relive the moments, or play some that he's never seen.

you do know a lot about him, huh? LOL

you really had to login with a different account just to support yourself?

face it, dude: basic sucks, basic for text-adventures sucks even more. Your original classics - even Scott Adams siliness - weren't written in basic, but in tools of their own and running on a virtual machine for the severely lacking machines back then. Your parser and world model simply lack the finesse of TADS and Inform and your writing is a joke. The fact that you can't even see that is what makes you and Paul Allen Panks so alike in kookiness... has he really died, I wonder...
Bishopofbasic, October 14, 2015 - Reply
Thanks for the input. Now I could careless what you think and the opinions that you expressed made me chuckle with laughter. HAHAHAHAHAHA. You must be one of those people that absolutely loved "Get Lamp". Now, I will be writing even more games in qbasic. Maybe I'll move over to something else...maybe. But for the mean time I'll be sitting her at my computer, pumping out a new game every few days until the end of time. So which games have you wrote? Just curious.
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