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Lecture Feature

by Paul Equinox Collins

Humor
2009

About the Story

You are awake, but you would rather not be. The severe cramp in your neck seems almost inconsequential in comparison with the pounding in your head. Your suspicions are roused as to what may have happened the previous night because, as yet, you can remember nothing. A peculiarly furry sensation in your mouth, combined with the unmistakable stench of very cheap scotch, adds to your mounting fear.

By the time your vision clears and you notice that you are lying in the bath of your friend's hall of residence, it is clear to you that you are a victim of Jessica's 21st Birthday Party, as advertised on lamp posts and fences across the city for the past three months.

Your liver is reporting major difficulties and your stomach produces intermittent gurgles of protest. Your head drowns out all other considerations, however, and you sit up, take a look around you, and pray for death...


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