Sam's Un-Excellent Adventure!

SynTax
After flailing around for 1 hour through 9 locations, and finding an assortment of red herrings (literally, in one case) and some objects which seemed impossible to manipulate or deal with in any way known to man, woman, person or robot, I decided enough was enough. Two doors remained stubbornly locked despite it being fairly obvious how to open them, and I rapidly lost patience with the `try to guess the verb' game that a very limited parser and a restrictive verb/noun input results in.
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